~*7,13,16-----21 ;)

us all from TTDI @ Su Yi's 21st birthday...

i cannot possible begin to describe just how entirely low in the dumps i am about my current financial situation! all these birthdays are getting waaaaaaaaaaay out of hand! how can everyone be born in the month of March?? well least what i can be grateful of is the conviction that i didn't have to buy a present for myself and everybody else had to ;)

but a having a close friend turning 21 is a celebrated occasion and i splurged my remaining pieces of red notes for Su Yi's birthday. And what fun we had at her party...i caught up with so many ppl which i didn't have a chance to even sit and have a decent conversation with during my party, so su yi's party was my chance! It feels really liberating not to be hosting your own party, cus you get the freedom to do so many stupid things and not having to wander from one table to another only to catch bits and pieces of every group’s conversation.

to me, what makes 21 such a special number is the very core underlying issue that comes with it. and to me, that 'core underlying issue' is the one thing i had spent 21 years of my life looking for..."MYSELF".don't you agree? well of course, if you'd found yourself at an earlier age, skip this entry aight, i don't wan to sound like some slow grower amidst you ppl who have the opportunity to know who you are at an earlier age.

at 7, you meet new people apart from your family and all you ever cared about is where are you going to get a new pink bag for the following year? or is anyone going to get you a new pencil case for the start of the school year? or maybe who is next you're going to scream "I dowan to fren u edi!" to...

at 10, i spell TEN as AWKWARD AGE...where you're in between of everything. you want to try to be tomboyish but somehow it's not working out, you try girly, but your clothes spells UNDERAGE! you're neither a teenager, nor a kid (although frankly speaking, anyone not even near the age of 18 to me is a KID! hahahaha) and what's more, the worst part of being ten is not being able to fit into clothes from the Children Section and desperately tooooo young for the Teenager Section. So where do you stand? SO SO SO AWKWARD!

at 13, things improves slightly, but only ever so slightly, because you get to wear clothes you can actually say "yes, this is from Lasenza Girl" (or whatever girls the age of 13 these days wear that constitute as being in the teenage section) however, the 'improve slightly' goes out the window because at this age you start to rebel! rebel rebel rebel rebel rebel rebel and rebel! you think you're right and your mother ALWAYS misunderstands you. You want to stay out late because you think it's ok, but mom says otherwise, NOT OK. You want to catch a movie with a friend because you deserve it, but mom says otherwise, WATCH DVD AT HOME!. At this rate, you either start to meditate to calm yourself down or you rebel. So 13 is a MISUNDERSTOOD & REBBELIOUS AGE. you're always to be blame for everything, even society blames you at this age...ever heard of "Haihhh, teenagers these days, i tell you!" .. Familiar? bet at tht time you never realised you were being misunderstood by the society rite? however sucky that sounds, yea, 13 is misunderstood and 13 is rebellious (maybe not all, but majority).

at 16, things naturally improves and mom unties the tough knot she bound you with to let you go a little, to let you breath a little. Perhaps that is how sixteen got its name SWEET SIXTEEN. 16 is sweet...maybe life starts a little when you get to 16, and maybe you start to understand yourself a little at this age (though not entirely). 16, undeniably is the age where things have never been sweeter and what mattered at that time is having a sweet time, sweet life, sweet this and that but what sticks is that 16 is also NAIVE, because you think that nothing can go wrong! well you're wrong!

finally at 21, you're no longer that absolutely naive person you were before. though not any wiser, what counts now is that 21 is not naive! i've only been 21 for 5 days, so i speak for myself personally from here...THE KEY, you knw THE KEY, a symbol for freedom that your parents give you on your 21st bday, well ideally, it represents you're an adult at the legal age to do all things illegal once, drink, smoke (??what a joke!), clubbing (?????an even bigger joke!), well you knw the works. Personally, the key liberates me from age 1 to 20. where you're no longer anywhere near the age between 1 to 20. You've been freed from those traumatized years where you keep searching and searching for yourself. It must have been a tiring marathon and the key awaits you at the end of the line.

and at the end of the line, my prize is the key but my grand prize is ultimately myself.